Monday, September 21, 2020
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Having the Last Name of Biden Sure Gets A Lot of Joe’s Family Out of Jail

Have you ever punched a cop and later had the good fortune to have prosecutors dismiss the case against you? Or how about this one: Have you ever racked up more than a hundred grand on a stolen credit card, only to receive probation for the crime? Incidents like this sound like that “white privilege” that the kids on Twitter are always talking about these days. But this is a different sort of privilege. You might call it “Biden privilege,” for a lack of an official term. Here’s a closer look at what “Biden privilege” allows you to get away with in America.

Hunter Biden is obviously the one who comes to mind when you hear the words “Biden” and “substance abusing child of privilege” used in the same sentence, so we’ll start with him. You might remember Hunter Biden’s non-arrest in 2016, right before the election. Hunter Biden returned a rental car and accidentally left his iPhone and a bunch of other personal items in the front seat of the car, including “a” crack pipe. We have to call it “a” crack pipe because cops in Yuma, Arizona were unable to determine whether it was “Hunter Biden’s crack pipe,” and thus never filed any charges in the case.

Hunter was also kicked out of the Navy on drug charges, but his first arrest happened all the way back in 1988. He was busted for drug possession in New Jersey. But instead of doing any jail time in that arrest, Hunter Biden – the son of Delaware Sen. Joe Biden – was allowed to do a pre-trial intervention and his criminal record was expunged.

 

Creepy Joe’s daughter Ashley Biden has had a few run-ins with law enforcement as well. Ashley was busted for marijuana possession in New Orleans in 1999. While New Orleans police were able to confirm the arrest record, it turns out that Ashley Biden never had to go to court and never faced any punishment in that case.

A few years later, Ashley Biden was arrested at a Chicago bar during what’s been described as a “bottle-throwing brawl” by the New York Post. When police were trying to arrest one of the bottle throwers, Ashley Biden jumped in front of the cops to try to stop them and made “intimidating statements” to the them. Probably along the lines of “Don’t you know who my father is?!”

Ashley was charged with obstructing a police officer, but the Chicago DA helpfully dropped the case.

Caroline Biden, Joe’s trendy art-dealer niece, has had a few more brushes with the law than the average person as well. In 2013, her roommate confronted Caroline about unpaid rent in their luxury Tribeca apartment. The screaming fit that Caroline threw resulted in the cops being called. When police arrived, Caroline tried to punch a female officer in the face. As she was being handcuffed, she was flailing her arms and throwing slaps at all of the officers. Those antics continued all the way until they stuffed her into a jail cell.

The DA’s office dropped the case.

In 2017, Caroline Biden was busted for stealing a person’s credit card and racking up $110,000 on it. If you were to commit felony grand larceny on a scale like that, you’d likely end up in prison for a few years. But when your last name is “Biden”… you get two years’ probation.

Frank Biden, the 66-year-old younger brother of Creepy Basement Joe, makes the “Biden privilege” list as well. Frank received six months’ probation for a Florida DUI in 2003 and was then allowed to do three months of rehab a few months later when he was busted for driving with a suspended license.

In one of the odder Biden family arrests, Frank was busted for petty theft at a Blockbuster Video in 2003, when he stuffed a couple of DVDs down the front of his pants. The prosecutor dropped the case. Blockbuster probably didn’t want the videos back anyway.

Is it fair to pick on Creepy Joe Biden’s relatives like this by digging into their sordid, trailer-trash history? Probably not. But it does make you wonder how Joe Biden has wielded his influence with local police departments over the years. Having “Biden privilege” appears to mean that you never end up doing serious jail time for crimes that send regular people to jail.


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