Admit it: You were delighted when even the liberal mainstream media started assigning numbers to the Democrats running for the 2020 nomination. They have so many cookie cutter candidates at this point that it’s just easier to give them all a number.
I can’t wait to see how the DNC is going to handle this at the debates. Will they get a number on a square piece of paper that they have to pin to the front of their pantsuit, as if they’re running a marathon? Or will they opt for a little plastic thingy with a number on it like you get at your table when you order a burger and fries?
I’m hoping for the marathon numbers. It will be fun to watch their servants attach the numbers to them, because none of the candidates are smart enough to operate a safety pin.
Not that I plan on watching any of the Democrat debates. Why would anyone watch those? Trump Maximus won’t be in them.
One of the funniest elements of the 2020 election will be when Democrats try to hold their debate schedule, and Trump holds a rally at the same time every night that draws more viewers.
While the media tells us there are 24 candidates running for the Democrat nomination so far, there are actually 254 declared candidates. Two others have expressed interest in running, one has dropped out and another 38 people who have been courted to run have declined thus far.
Even among the top 24 who occasionally get mentioned on the news, some are utterly unknown. For example, did you know that Wayne Messam is in the top 24? He’s the mayor of Miramar, Florida. Mike Gravel is also running, and he’s considered a top-24 contender. Gravel was a US Senator from Alaska in the 1970s. He’s 11 years older than Bernie Sanders.
When the 24th “major” candidate declared his campaign the other day, the media instantly started calling him Candidate 24.
And Candidate 24 is a… um… a mayor! Candidate 24 is the mayor of… New York City!
The 2020 field of Dems is so boring that you almost wish Trump would switch parties for a few months, just to watch him mow them down. Let’s get this party started!
Who is the real frontrunner in this gaggle of socialists trying to out-socialism each other? It’s impossible to tell at this point. The media is no help in this matter (not that they are a “help” on any other issue, either).
Two months ago, Robert Francis O’Rourke was the media’s assumed frontrunner. Rather than outright lying about his heritage like Pocahontas Warren, Robert Francis O’Rourke gave himself a hip Hispanic nickname to lure illegal aliens into voting for him. He never said he was Hispanic, he just called himself “Beto” – Spanish for “Bob.”
The mainstream media absolutely loved the skateboarding pothead “Beto” back in March. They couldn’t stop gushing about him.
But then, the fickle media decided in April that they wanted to go to the prom with Deep State Pete instead. Mayor Buttigieg was everything that Beto was not. Buttigieg was gay and he had sat on a Deep State corporate board with Chelsea Clinton.
Other than that, he was pretty much identical to “Beto.” Buttigieg has no clear policies. But that didn’t stop the media from going weak in the knees for him.
When Creepy Sleepy Joe Biden jumped in the race finally, the media quickly dumped Mayor Pete and began fawning over Biden. He now has a double-digit lead in all the polls over all of the other candidates. And we all know how reliable polls are!
Biden is carrying so much baggage that it’s questionable whether he will even make it to the first primary next January. His son “Hunter” Biden is the biggest piece of that baggage by far. Hunter Biden made billions of dollars from deals with communist China while his dad was Obama’s Vice President.
We’ve also learned that police investigated Hunter Biden in 2016 – just days before Donald Trump’s election – over a rental car that Hunter returned in Arizona.
It turns out that Hunter Biden left his wallet, credit cards, driver’s license and iPhone in the car when he returned it. Oh, and there was also a cocaine pipe, a bag of drugs and a phone number for a “world-renowned colon hydrotherapy specialist” named Jade St. Angel in the car – which doesn’t sound like a hooker’s name at all!
Prosecutors declined to press charges against Hunter Biden, because he’s a privileged Democrat. Laws are for little people like you and me. When the Joe Biden campaign sinks to the bottom of the ocean, the anchor will have the letters H-U-N-T-E-R printed on it.
The media always plays these guessing games when there is a crowded Democrat field for a presidential primary, and they are always wrong. The media had been playing up Hillary Clinton as Definitely the First Female President of the United States for 15 years when the 2008 primaries arrived. How did that work out?
In 2004, Democrats Joe Lieberman, John Edwards, Wesley Clark, Howard Dean, Dennis Kucinich, John Kerry, Carol Mosely Braun, and Al Sharpton were all running for president. The media started out by telling us the race was Joe Lieberman’s to lose, due to his turn as Al Gore’s VP running mate in 2000. But then it became a ping-pong match between John Edwards and Howard Dean. The media just couldn’t make up its mind!
John Edwards was so dreamy! He had that special hair, he was a super-rich slimy trial lawyer, and he had a secret mistress and lovechild on the side that he had conceived while his wife was dying in the hospital of cancer.
But then there was Howard Dean, who was screechy and mad and socialist all the time. How was the media supposed to choose between those two dreamboats?!
And of course, John Kerry, the most boring candidate to run for president in the past 80 years (until Candidate 23 came along just this month!) ran away with the nomination and trampled everyone else into dust. Wesley Clark won the Oklahoma primary, Howard Dean won Vermont, John Edwards won South Carolina, Dennis Kucinich won Alaska, and it wasn’t even close in any other state. No one predicted at any point in the 2004 primary season that John Kerry had a chance at the nomination.
The lesson? It will probably be at least a year from the day when you read this until anyone knows who the Democrat nominee will be. And that’s when the fun will actually start for everyone, because the 2020 sacrificial lamb will finally have to go on stage against Donald Trump.